You can do it, but you have to live student poor. Student family housing might have two bedrooms, so you are going to have to really stuff those kids in. I would say your spouse could earn a good living, but she would have to take care of the kids.I knew a Mormon guy with like five kids and a wife working on his PhD. I'm not even sure if he finished.
Even ignoring the money, it is tough to not be with the kids. I realize that we often do the big things with our kids, and think that is enough. You really have to do the little things too.
It seems like it would work when I am retired. I don't know if the PhD program that is eager to take me back would be as eager in 10 years, when I am 65, but maybe.Almost all the people I can remember who got their PhD in their 20s were either single and full time students, or if they were married they didn't have kids.
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Every attempt on this thread to prove I'm a "liar" ended in utter failure.